Sunday, January 1, 2012

::Shake It Up::

Oh. Mai. Gawd. It's already another year and only now I'm updating mai bloggie. ._. I'm so sowie! >w< I honestly had the time to spare to update these past few months (oh crap, now I feel like an awful person. ==) but I didn't bother. Partially because after August was a whirlwind of exams and meaningless stress. Partially because I was too distracted by other things to vent to you. Partially because I'm too caught up in running away. Mostly because I'm just plain lazy though. xD Once again, I apologize. v_v

I'd like to say I have tons to update you about everything that happened these past few months. But, I honestly can't remember anything. ._. I feel like I barely lived the last year and now the new year is charging past. Turning back for a moment, I realize I missed out a lot. I realize I didn't cherish moments that were meant to be cherished. I realize I was a bit of an arse at times. I realize I made so many happy moments until they have blurred. I realize I made friends in places I never knew were even possible. I may not have really lived last year, but I made it count in all the ways that make it seem it doesn't count. x)

Alrighty~ Time for my New Year resolution? =P I never bothered to make one before. Why? I'd never follow through with it. XD This year is gonna be different though. I've got nothing to lose after all. ^^ After much thought, I decided to have a simple yet meaningful resolution. Have. Fun. Even now I can feel the weight of 2012 bearing down. It signifies a stressful year with loads of hardships when it starts and heartache when it ends. I refuse to be swept up in all that havoc. >w< I wanna have fun this year. I'll make that possible somehow. :D Honestly, these next twelve months are gonna be the last time I see all these awesome people at one place. I'll be damned if I waste it. -o-

Eh, now I wanna vent out some stuff. I haven't done that enough anyway. x] Anyway, this year is the one I always dreaded to arrive. After all the suffering which will surely flash by, I'm gonna be alone. I'll have to manage myself in a place far from everything I've known. Of course, there's plenty of other insecurities I have. Will I do well enough? How am I ever gonna make it? Should I leave? They keep dancing in my head and shaking up my confidence. Not like I had much of that in the first place anyway. xD Which is why I'm desperate to have fun. I need to avoid getting caught up in this. >.>

Anyway, tadaa~ The nutshell version of the past few months. ^-^ Of course, I would be in a jittery mess if I didn't write. Gosh~ That totally eases my frustration and anxiety. =] Now, I'm off to hunt for food with the pinky promise to update as often as I can, bloggie. And, of course, the plea of you not hitting me in the more possible chance of falling through on that. >.> I need to start making promises I actually keep. =P

your everyday repetitive life, right now, shake it up!
your repeated thoughts of sadness, right now, shake it up!